109. After years of failed IVF and the heartbreak of secondary infertility, Jaclyn had finally accepted she would be a mother of one. But at age 40, a major career pivot and a $15 supplement led to the natural miracle she’d been waiting over a decade for.
On episode 109, Jaclyn shares her incredible 12-year gap between children. Jaclyn opens up about the grueling process of IUI and IVF, the emotional toll of a negative pregnancy tests and the “secondary infertility” that many women face in silence. She shares how leaving a high-stress 60-hour work week and moving to a new city created the space for a surprise pregnancy just weeks after her 40th birthday.
We also dive into the practical realities of being a “geriatric” pregnant woman, from managing extreme nausea and low iron to the logistics of a scheduled C-section during COVID. Jaclyn shares why she chose to embrace a more relaxed parenting style the second time around and how she is now helping other moms build deep emotional foundations through her work at Family with a Gap. Whether you are currently in the thick of infertility or navigating a large age gap between your kids, this conversation is a beautiful reminder that it’s never too late for a new chapter.
About the Guest
Jaclyn Cowart is the creator of Family with a Gap, a blog and community dedicated to sharing the journey of secondary infertility and the unique dynamics of parenting children with a significant age difference. A mother of two—a 16-year-old son and a 4-year-old daughter—Jaclyn uses her experience to support women navigating the emotional highs and lows of midlife motherhood. She is currently developing the Connected from Day One Method, a guide designed to help parents build strong emotional bonds with their newborns to foster lifelong trust and communication.
Connect with Jaclyn:
- Instagram: @familywithagap
- Website: Family with a Gap
Key Topics
- Navigating Secondary Infertility: The emotional weight of wanting a second child when the first came so easily.
- The Transition from Corporate to Calm: How reducing stress and leaving a “workaholic” lifestyle impacted her health and fertility.
- IVF vs. Natural Miracle: Moving on after a failed embryo transfer and the surprise of a natural conception at 40.
- The 12-Year Age Gap: The joys and logistical challenges of raising a teenager and a toddler simultaneously.
- Birth & Recovery at 40: Comparing a traumatic emergency C-section in her 20s to a scheduled, calm recovery in her 40s.
- Letting Go of the “Perfect” Schedule: Why being a more relaxed “older” mom can be a refreshing shift for the whole family.
Resources & Links
Note: Some of the links below are affiliate links, which means I may receive a small commission at no extra cost to you if you make a purchase. I only recommend products our guests truly love!
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YouTube: Watch Episodes HERE
Recommended Products: Vitex Supplement & Pregnancy Pillow & Belly Butter
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Community: Join the Over 40 Fabulous Facebook Group or get on the Waitlist to Know When the next TTC Sisterhood Circle meets on Zoom.
Transcript
Jamie: Jaclyn, welcome to the show.
Jaclyn: Hi, thank you so much. Thanks for having me.
Jamie: Today we are sharing Jacqueline’s pregnancy story at 40. But before we get started, Jacqueline, will you tell us a little bit about yourself?
Jaclyn: Sure. I am 45 now, I am a mother of two. I have a 16-year-old son and a little girl who’s four and a half, and she of course, was the one that was born just before my 41st birthday, which was super unexpected.
Jamie: You have a 12 year gap in between your kids. Will you tell us like how that started? Did you always want kids and how was his pregnancy?
Jaclyn: I wanted to be a mom for as long as I can remember. I got married in March of 2000. And we actually started trying I think in October of the same year, so pretty quick. I got pregnant right away in November. I actually got pregnant on Thanksgiving Day.
Jamie: Wow.
Jaclyn: I thought that we were the luckiest people in the world. I had a pretty uneventful pregnancy with him. No sickness no complications at all. He was actually born on his due date, which is crazy and cool, but it’s so fitting for him.
The following year, just before he turned one, we decided we wanted to start trying again. So we did, and nothing happened. Months went by, years went by, and we had no success. And that’s when I first learned about secondary infertility and how common it really is for women.
Jamie: What were the steps? ’cause you did IVF. How long did you wait until you started that process?
Jaclyn: We started with a doctor up in Tampa through UUSF. When we were going to him, we started with the medications, Clom Med, that sort of thing. Then we eventually did a couple rounds of IUI and again, nothing worked with that.
Jamie: How long did you go before you were like, okay, we need help?
Jaclyn: Probably about two years, I would say. And when we first started the process with the infertility doctor.
Jamie: Okay.
Jaclyn: We went through a couple cycles of IUII had never. Really been sold on doing IVF. After we went through all the iis and didn’t have that happen for us, I gave up.
I felt if it was in God’s plan, it would happen. If it didn’t happen, then maybe I was just meant to be a mom of one, which I was always so incredibly grateful. I didn’t ever let that negativity really creep into my mind. I tried to stay positive and stay thankful for him.
Just before I turned 36, I just was like, oh my God, I gotta do something. I gotta try something. It had been so long. And so we decided to go to a doctor here in Sarasota and started the IVF process. With him, they did all the testing. Everything came back normal. Everything came back normal with my husband. There was no reason why I wasn’t getting pregnant. So in my mind I’m like, okay, we’re a perfect candidate for IVF, they’re gonna fertilize the embryos, they’re gonna put ’em in there at the right time. I’m gonna be on all the medication, it’s gonna work.
We did everything, had the egg retrieval. I had 10 embryos that fertilized initially.
Jamie: Those are great numbers.
Jaclyn: Yeah, it was fantastic. But after the five days we were down to two.
Jamie: Wow.
Jaclyn: And so they had kept telling me, it’s probably your egg quality. It’s probably your egg quality. Which, why that would be the case. I have no idea. We had the two embryos. We did get ’em PG tested and one came back Normal.
In December of 2016, December 15th, 2016, we had our transfer. And I was gonna find out the day after Christmas how the timing worked out. It’s Christmas, you’re hopeful. So excited and I went and had my blood test done and it was negative and that was it.
Jamie: How did you feel about that?
Jaclyn: At that point it was just very eye-opening. This is it, we’re just gonna have one, and I just tried to move on and my son was he had turned eight, I believe, during that process.
He had helped me along the way, like he knew everything that was going on. He always wanted to have a sibling, so he had helped me with my shots and all that. So in hindsight, I probably shouldn’t have had him that involved ’cause he was equally as devastated when it didn’t work. I guess it’s a good lesson for him, but it was really hard. It was really hard on all of us.
The following year in 2017, my husband had a, an opportunity for a job promotion that was gonna require us to move. With that happening, I was gonna be leaving the family business that I had been at that point. I had worked full-time always. And I was gonna be a stay-at-home mom for the first time. Which was like, oh my gosh.
We moved at the end of 2017 to Gainesville, Florida, and then COVID came and all that fun stuff. Everything had just gone out of our minds as far as ever having another one. And in I think it was November 1st. Of 2020 we were leaving to go run errands and stuff, and I said to my husband, I’m like, my period’s two weeks late. And he was like, what? And I’m like, yeah. I had just turned 40 the month before and I’m like. I don’t know, maybe I’m in like perimenopause, I’m 40 now and he’s that’s crazy. Let’s go get a test. And I’m like, oh my gosh. How many tests have we taken? How much money have we wasted?
Jamie: How much disappointment?
Jaclyn: Yes. I had never had a positive pregnancy test since my son.
Jamie: Yeah.
Jaclyn: And so we had to go to Home Depot. We went a couple places and we stopped at CVS and brought the test home. I go in the bathroom and I take it and it is like instantly positive. So then you take another one, and it’s positive too. And it’s just like cow, is this really happening?
Jamie: Uhhuh?
Jaclyn: Is this really real? We told my son like that minute and he was just bawling.
Jamie: Oh.
Jaclyn: He was 11 , gonna be turning 12. So over the moon, so excited. Then the fear sets in. Is she gonna be healthy? He or she gonna be healthy? What’s gonna happen? So very exciting, huge mix of emotions, but totally unbelievable that would happen naturally.
Jamie: Now you moved in this time, was there anything that you like changed diet, like supplements or anything that you changed during this time?
Jaclyn: The biggest change when I was living here in Sarasota and working, I was working like 60 plus hours a week. I was getting up every day at four 30 in the morning.
Jamie: Oh my gosh.
Jaclyn: Getting on the computer. I did it on Saturdays and Sundays too. Like I was just crazy workaholic.
So when I moved there. I was relaxed. I joined the gym. I went and worked out a couple times a week. I went on walks every day. I ate at home, homemade food during the day instead of eating out lunch and stuff all the time. I think I was just overall much healthier in every aspect.
I had a friend, it was one of my son’s baseball teammates, and she started taking Vitex Plus you can order on Amazon. It’s like $15.
Jamie: Yeah, it’s cheap. I’m taking that right now also.
Jaclyn: Oh my gosh, yes. So she calls me and she’s Hey. She wasn’t wanting to have any more kids. She had two kids already, but she was having trouble with her period and regulation and stuff. So she said, I’m taking these pills and they’ve just made me feel so much better. But it says on there that they’re good for fertility. She’s have you ever thought about taking them? And I’m like, no. And she’s just order ’em. They’re like 15 bucks. I took them for the two weeks prior to, missing my period of that cycle that I got pregnant.
Jamie: Wow, that’s wild.
Jaclyn: So I don’t know if it was just like a little bit of progesterone boost Uhhuh, that I needed or what, but it was so crazy. And the funniest thing is I had to call the doctor and wean off of them, ’cause you can’t just quit them cold Turkey. And so I had gone through all that process and probably about eight weeks later she called me and she was like, Hey. How did you get off the Vitex? What did you have to do?
And so I told her and I’m like, why? And she’s I am freaking pregnant. And my husband is so mad at me and she was my age too. So It’s hilarious.
Jamie: Your age, your friend are pregnant.
Jaclyn: Yes. So we have like funny pictures of us at, the travel baseball tournaments and stuff with our older boys and then our pregnant bellies and our kids are eight weeks apart.
Jamie: Oh my gosh. That’s hilarious.
Jaclyn: Yes. Super, super, super funny. Obviously they absolutely adore him, but yes, she’s my husband’s so mad, super, super funny. So yeah, that was the only thing that I changed medication wise, supplement wise.
Jamie: Yeah. I’m sure mentally you were also healthier too.
Jaclyn: Yes very much I was getting to spend so much time with my son too. Even with all the travel with him, with sports and stuff like that, it was just such a much more relaxed environment ’cause I wasn’t trying to do all of that and work full time.
Jamie: Yeah.
Jaclyn: So it was great.
Jamie: How was your pregnancy?
Jaclyn: Completely opposite of what it was the first time. I don’t know if it’s ’cause she was a girl versus a boy, but I was so sick.
Jamie: Oh yeah.
Jaclyn: I was so sick. I was so tired. Or maybe it’s ’cause I was 40. I don’t know. I, and the further it went along in the pregnancy, the sicker I got, like by the last trimester, I was absolutely miserable. I couldn’t eat anything. My husband, we would go out to dinner and stuff and he would say you got to eat. And I’m like, I just have to order like some soup or something. I was definitely ready for her to be born.
Jamie: Yeah.
Jaclyn: But as far as weight gain and and all of that was fine. I didn’t have any complications with her.
I did have every test under the sun. Sure. To make sure that she was healthy.
Jamie: Yeah.
Jaclyn: And then finding out that she was a girl so early was really cool.
Jamie: Yeah. Tell us about that.
Jaclyn: I think I was only 13 weeks. It might have been even sooner than that. We did a baseball gender reveal, of course. ‘Cause my son, played baseball. So we got the baseball that exploded. We had the blue, we had the pink. I gave the little envelope to my friend and they came over. And again, it was during COVID we just did it in the front yard, like the same day I had the envelope. We didn’t invite anybody over other than the friend that videoed it.
We just took pictures, posted it online, told everybody. And my son of course, wanted a boy. My husband and I were just so excited that we were having one at all. Didn’t mind either way, but we got the little princess girl.
Jamie: Oh, that’s wonderful. When you went to your doctor, did you use the same one you used with your son?
Jaclyn: I didn’t because we were Oh, you were? Yeah. We, and actually my doctor from here had in Sarasota, had retired.
Jamie: Gotcha.
Jaclyn: I would’ve had a different doctor anyway.
Jamie: Gotcha.
Jaclyn: I ended up having two doctors ’cause I had the doctor in Gainesville through the majority of the pregnancy. And then we decided to actually move back to Sarasota to be by my family before she was born. She was gonna be born in June. Her, she was due in July. She ended up being born in June. So we needed to get back here before the next school year started for my son.
So we moved back to Sarasota in May. So I had a doctor in Gainesville that was great. He was funny. He was an older gentleman. He told me his mom had him at 40 and back then when he was young, that was like crazy.
Jamie: Yeah.
Jaclyn: So he was super relaxed about my age and and my pregnancy. And he actually had even said that he would be comfortable with me having a vbac ’cause I had a c-section with my son which I contemplated. I really wanted to give that a try. I had a pretty traumatic birth with my son and my husband was terrified to try and do a vaginal birth.
Then my doctor, when I switched back in Sarasota, he was a little less comfortable with me going full term at my age.
Jamie: For pregnancy, was there any products or anything that helped you through pregnancy that you could recommend?
Jaclyn: Yeah, I definitely used a big, huge body pillow to put under my belly. I think I did use belly butter also. I didn’t get any stretch marks with either one of them, which is fantastic.
Jamie: Wow. Yeah.
Jaclyn: Which is surprising ’cause I’m pretty fair skinned and I feel fair skinned people it does happen to quite a bit. I am very like anti-medication type of person so I didn’t even really take Tylenol or Ibuprofen or anything like that. Okay. I definitely drank more soda than I did with my son. They always say the second time around you’re like, oh, it’ll be fine. Everything’s fine.
Jamie: Yeah.
Jaclyn: But in saying that, my son to this day does not drink soda and despises it, and I drank it with her and she is like a soda fee. Every time I have a Coke, she’s can I have some? Can I have some?
Jamie: That’s funny.
Jaclyn: Yes.
Jamie: What about preparation? Because you’re having a girl, so what was the preparation like for her arrival?
Jaclyn: Because of the difference in age. Two, we didn’t have anything anymore. We had slowly over the years gotten rid of. All of his stuff as far as furniture and stuff like that.
I got to have multiple baby showers. I had one in Gainesville before we left with all of our friends that we had made when we were living up there. And then I had one here in Sarasota. We got everything we could ever imagine my parents bought her crib and all that stuff for her room. I think that everybody was so excited ’cause she was so long waited for and so anticipated that yeah, everybody just went crazy. So it was hectic with the move and then moving into the town home. We had very limited space. And and then we moved again when she was seven months old, we moved into the house. Yeah, it was pretty wild and crazy times.
Jamie: Is there anything about your pregnancy that you wanna mention before we get into your c-section? Cravings or anything?
Jaclyn: It was so odd with the way that I felt. I know the first trimester with her I craved fruit. I ate a ton of fruit. It was really all that I could eat. And then I couldn’t really eat a whole lot of meat or anything like that with her.
It was just very odd with my son the first time I ate ice cream every single day. Just so much ice cream and a lot of carbs. It was just carbs and ice cream. It’s probably not very healthy, but yeah, so not too crazy with the diet, since I felt the way that I felt.
Jamie: Did anything help with it? Nausea sha
Jaclyn: Not really. I would try to drink ginger ale. It would settle my stomach a little bit. I can’t think of anything off the top of my head that made me feel better. And like I said I didn’t ever wanna take any medication or anything, so I just dealt with it.
Jamie: Yeah. When did you decide to do a C-section instead of a vbac? Because I know it you were thinking about doing a VBAC
Jaclyn: probably around six months. I really did keep pressing my husband. I’m like, ’cause I with my son, I had wanted to go all natural, no epidural. No, nothing was the goal with him. But as and a big lesson for pregnant women is be prepared to throw your birth plan out the window because it never was the way that you think it’s gonna go.
I had been pretty disappointed with how it went with him. And then ending in the emergency C-section obviously so thankful that he was okay, it could have gone sideways quickly. But I really did feel in my heart that if I was able to go into labor naturally with her, that I could do it and I could have her without any pain medicine or anything like that.
I also respected the way that he felt and, the way that the C-section went with my son, and it’s its own huge story and we can talk about it if you’d like to talk about it or I don’t know if we have time. But he had vowed in the hospital that day that he would never be in the room when I had another baby. That’s how bad it was.
Jamie: Oh gosh.
Jaclyn: And he wasn’t, he did not come in when I had my daughter my mom. He actually wasn’t even at the hospital. Him and my son and my father-in-law had left to go get something to eat
Jamie: Uhhuh,
Jaclyn: and they didn’t even make it back when she was born. I’m sending pictures, the nurse was so nice. She was taking pictures and I’m sending them from my phone to him as soon as she was born. And he’s we’re at Subway.
Jamie: Oh
Jaclyn: my gosh. I’m glad that everything’s great, but my mom was so excited to be in there. It meant the world to her. Yeah. She had never been in a birth and she cut her umbilical cord and all that.
Oh,
Jamie: can we back up because you were like early at 37 weeks whenever you had a C-section.
Jaclyn: Yes. She was born 37 and a half weeks. 38 weeks.
Jamie: yeah. Why was it so early?
Jaclyn: I don’t know how much truth there is to this. Hopefully it’s truthful that with me being the age that I was and having a c-section prior, he really didn’t want to let me go full term.
He felt like the risk of her going full term didn’t outweigh the benefits. He had told me that he wanted to have her early and then I can’t even remember what happened with the scheduling, but he was like super booked and then they had an opening on a Saturday and we just booked it and had her early.
Jamie: Okay. You wanna walk us through that day?
Jaclyn: I had to be there super, super early in the morning and then since it was COVID it was still so ridiculous. I have a picture of me and my husband and my son in the hospital that morning. It’s like our last picture of the three of us together before she was born.
That was another part of the reason why my son and. My husband and father-in-law left the hospital ’cause they couldn’t even be anywhere near me. They had to take me in. I had to have a COVID test that delayed everything and sit there and wait for that to come back. I was by myself. They wouldn’t even let my mom in there with me at this point.
They didn’t let her in until it was time to actually go in and do the surgery. The surgery was super fast , went as well as it could be expected. And my recovery honestly, was just as easy as the first time, believe it or not, Uhhuh. Which I was surprised, obviously being older.
I got her out, sewed me up and I think I went home the next day. I didn’t have to stay too long.
Jamie: Oh wow. Usually they, you stay longer for a C-section?
Jaclyn: The first time I was there three nights. But I believe they let me go. Maybe I had to stay two nights. It was definitely shorter than the first time for sure. Maybe they gave me the boot ’cause of COVID.
Jamie: Oh, yeah, I can see that. Tell us more about your recovery. Like your, how did you feel? When did you feel healed?
Jaclyn: I cleared me too after her at six weeks rather than the eight weeks, which was surprising. I healed up super fast. I obviously was in really good shape. I had continued my exercise in going to the gym throughout the entire pregnancy. Between that I guess, and the not being able to eat anything, I only gained 14 pounds think with her.
Jamie: Yeah. So ’cause you weren’t hungry, right?
Jaclyn: No.
Jamie: You were nauseous the whole time too.
Jaclyn: I felt bad the, she was probably starving. She was six pounds, 13 ounces, even with being early. So I feel like she was a good size. She was 19 and a half inches long.
I bounced right back. My son plays two sports, she’s been at the ball field since she was a week old.
Jamie: Oh, that’s cute.
Jaclyn: Yes, she went right to football practice ’cause it was summertime and then right into baseball season. And football season so she’s been outside since day one.
Jamie: And mentally, how were you during this time?
Jaclyn: I was totally over the moon. I didn’t have any baby blues or anything like that. And I always worried that because I was older. Maybe I wouldn’t be as patient with her as I was with my son. But it’s the complete opposite, like I think when you’ve waited for something for so long. And then you’ve witnessed how quickly? My oldest is grown up. He’s 16. He’s driving himself to school, driving himself to practice. We hardly even see him and it’s so sad. So we just cherish every single second that we have with her because I think we realize how fast it’s gonna be gone.
Jamie: Yeah.
Jaclyn: So that’s been a totally different experience.
Jamie: Yeah. And how did you choose to feed your baby?
Jaclyn: She was bottle fed.
Jamie: Okay.
Jaclyn: I am a total fan of breastfeeding. I bottle fed both of them because, and I guess this goes back to me being a weirdo about germs and medications and stuff like that. I got breast implants when I was in college in 1999, when I had my son, they were already 10 years old. And then, and it just, I don’t know, it weirded me out. And then I still have them.
I haven’t had them replaced yet.
Jamie: Okay.
Jaclyn: And so now they’re, or when she was born, they were 22 years old. Uhhuh. And I don’t know. I don’t know if there’s like mold in there. I don’t, I know that’s horrible and it’s disgusting to even think about, and I am, have actually had my first consultation to get them removed but I just was too scared to breastfeed her.
Jamie: Did they feel like engorged or anything? Did you have to go through that process?
Jaclyn: Yeah, my milk came in with both of them. Okay. But with not doing anything with it at all it was probably only a week and then everything started to subside.
Jamie: Okay.
Jaclyn: Before I had her, there was like that whole big thing with the breast implant illness. And then the women were always taking pictures and saying I have these old implants and I pumped this milk, and it looks like it has mold and stuff in it. I’m probably a weirdo, but anyway.
Jamie: No, that’s okay. I get it. Is there anything else about your birth or your pregnancy you wanna talk about?
Jaclyn: Other than, not having the opportunity to have a natural birth. But other than that it was pretty painless as far as, a surgery can be.
Jamie: Yeah.
Jaclyn: I never had to take anything more than Motrin as for pain medicine and stuff.
It went well.
Jamie: That’s great. And would you say there’s, like any difference between your kids in having a gap? Is there a challenge to that, would you say?
Jaclyn: There’s so many positives. So many positives. I think the most challenging part is just managing both of their schedules. ‘Cause they’re so completely opposite. We have obviously all the late nights and stuff like that.
And then she’s in school. She’s in BPK now, so she goes to school. But before my son started driving and my husband travels a lot for work. I would have to wake her up at six 15 in the morning to take him to school and then bring her home, get her ready, take her to school.
And that was really difficult, especially, when she’s out so late during the week at baseball games and all the things that we have going on with her brother. That’s probably been the most difficult thing. But she has also taught me that they don’t always have to be on a strict schedule.
I was the crazy schedule. Person with my son. Like we didn’t go out to dinner because he needed to go to bed. We couldn’t go and do this on a Saturday afternoon because he had to nap. That was the way that I was. And so now it’s just been totally thrown out the window with that because she just had to go everywhere with us all the time.
Jamie: That’s great. It’s refreshing to hear ’cause I’m probably a little too strict with like nap times and everything. So it’s good that I have the reality check that maybe I need to chill out sometimes.
Jaclyn: Totally stress myself out. I would literally put him in bed for a nap and if he was crying and didn’t wanna go to sleep and he was probably your son’s age. I would be like crying at my desk. What am I doing wrong? Like hyperventilating. Like he has to take a nap. Like the whole entire day is gonna be ruined if he doesn’t take a nap.
Now with her, and this was a huge change for my husband too, ’cause I would try and put her to bed for a nap and then 20 minutes later she’d be out in the living room playing and he’s what? What is going on? I’m like, I don’t know. She didn’t fall asleep. We’ll just go to bed early tonight. It’s fine.
Jamie: Who and cares.
Jaclyn: And she’s been fine. Yes.
Jamie: I like that attitude. I needed to hear it for sure.
Jaclyn: Yes so different. I remember being at my parents’ house. My parents lived like 45 minutes away from us when he was small, and we would have the pack and play over there and we’d try and get him to take a nap. And we would literally pack up and leave because he didn’t go to sleep. My husband was like, we have to go home. Like we have to go home. This is a disaster. And I’m like, so yeah, that’s probably the biggest change.
Jamie: Do you have any plans to have more kids in your forties?
Jaclyn: I do not. My husband, he’s it could work again. We did it this time. It could work again. So he wanted me to try and get pregnant again right away. With c-sections, it makes it a little bit more complicated having them back to back.
We decided in the end I had my tubes tied, which is so insane after everything that we went through. She was born in June and I turned 41 in September. We just felt so blessed to have her, that was the decision that we made.
Jamie: Okay. What has been your biggest challenge being pregnant in your forties?
Jaclyn: I think probably the. The sickness, the nausea, like it was really debilitating. I think if it had only lasted the first trimester, I could have handled it. But the fact that it got progressively worse by that, by the last trimester, I was just like, oh my gosh, we have got to get her out of here.
I’ve got to have my body back and be able to eat food again. And I did have really low iron too, and I’m guessing that has a lot to do with my diet and what I wasn’t able to eat. So I had gotten to the point where it was super close to needing a transfusion. Thankfully I was able to get it up some through I think I had some iron pills. I had the baby aspirin. I had all the silly things that they give the geriatric pregnant women.
Jamie: The pills I guess, worked enough.
Jaclyn: Yes.
Jamie: Okay. Gotcha.
Jaclyn: Yeah, I was able to get it up
Jamie: Okay
Jaclyn: with those, and they just weren’t too bad.
Jamie: Yeah. I think I did the liquids also. I had the same low iron too.
Jaclyn: Yeah.
Jamie: Is there anything you’d recommend that would help prepare someone for pregnancy and birth over 40?
Jaclyn: I think my biggest recommendation would be not to hesitate and don’t be nervous about it. I think that it’s absolutely amazing. I think just being in the stage of life that. We are in at this age versus, how we were in our twenties. It was just, it’s such a positive experience and it’s so common now too.
Now it’s just so common. For women to be pregnant in their forties and have little kids in their forties. So I would say just not to be worried about it at all and embrace the stage of life that you’re in.
Jamie: Perfect. And what advice would you give yourself when you’re pregnant if you could go back,
Jaclyn: That is a tough one. Probably just goes back to the worrying too, worrying about the health of the baby, worrying about the stigma of being an older mom. All of those types of things. I was super calm, like I said, I wasn’t working. I was home. Exercise was huge. I think that I think that’s so good for moms and babies.
I don’t know if it has anything to do with the exercising that I did, but Charlotte is like pure muscle. I swear she came out that way. And oh my gosh, I did all those sit-ups. It was just squeezing her and holding her in there, and she was having to move around, in such a tight spot.
But she’s so healthy and that was a huge fear too with autism and all of that thing too. But like I said, people are having healthy babies in their forties all the time.
Jamie: Yeah, that’s right. Well, would you like to tell us about your blog?
Jaclyn: I blog about our family. I just started working on, a new guide called Connected from Day One Method for pregnant moms and moms with newborns.
It’s called family With A Gap, and obviously it’s named based on our family situation. I started it I guess a couple of years ago, and really to share the journey of secondary in fertility was the main purpose of that. It’s grown from that into a kind of a parenting overview and, parenting the kids at different ages.
And in addition to that, I am writing a parenting guide called Connected from day one, and that has a huge emphasis on the importance of building your emotional relationship with your baby as soon as they are born and how a good foundation of communication and trust leads to really good toddler behavior and beyond.
I’m really excited about and have just started sharing on my Facebook and Instagram as well. I plan on also doing the same thing for secondary infertility because I think that is a huge issue that women are suffering silently alone. They deal with the questions every day. When are you gonna have more kids? Why don’t you have more kids? Do you really want your kids to be this far apart? What are you doing? I know how lonely that journey is, so I would love to be a support for women in that phase of their lives too.
Jamie: Would you like to give your links where our listeners can connect with you?
Jaclyn: Yeah, Family with a Gap on Instagram and Facebook and then the blog is Family with a gap.com.
Jamie: Awesome.
Jaclyn: Yeah.
Jamie: Jacqueline, thank you so much for coming on the show and sharing your story with us.
Jaclyn: Oh, you’re welcome. It’s been fun.